David Houssein:
I think the blog is well-intentioned, but it's also a bit unfair on some men by making all sorts of assumptions and negative sweeping statements.
What we don't know is how many men have wanted to take parental leave, but haven't done so because their wife / partner wanted or insisted on taking the parental leave. Let's not forget that there will be many women who are perfectly happy - we need to stop thinking that they are not.
I think the blog also assumes that couples haven't thought it through or even discussed the idea of shared parental leave. It is perfectly reasonable that some couples would like to, but financially can't. I think it really rubs salt in the wound for men who want to do it, but literally can't because they are the higher earners and essentially become trapped by that (I have commented before on why unequal pay harms both men and women).
I also object to the term "man up" in the context of a blog about equality. It's actually quite a sexist term and has been used in destructive ways towards men. This article better explains. Personally, I'd hate to be chastised and bullied ("man up" can really tread a fine line) by society if I was desperate to share parental leave but couldn't find a way to make it work.
What would be appropriate is to suggest that men, who are in a position to share parental leave but believe it's the "women's place" or that they can't do it, need to grow up.
David Houssein:
I think the blog is well-intentioned, but it's also a bit unfair on some men by making all sorts of assumptions and negative sweeping statements.
What we don't know is how many men have wanted to take parental leave, but haven't done so because their wife / partner wanted or insisted on taking the parental leave. Let's not forget that there will be many women who are perfectly happy - we need to stop thinking that they are not.
I think the blog also assumes that couples haven't thought it through or even discussed the idea of shared parental leave. It is perfectly reasonable that some couples would like to, but financially can't. I think it really rubs salt in the wound for men who want to do it, but literally can't because they are the higher earners and essentially become trapped by that (I have commented before on why unequal pay harms both men and women).
I also object to the term "man up" in the context of a blog about equality. It's actually quite a sexist term and has been used in destructive ways towards men. This article better explains. Personally, I'd hate to be chastised and bullied ("man up" can really tread a fine line) by society if I was desperate to share parental leave but couldn't find a way to make it work.
What would be appropriate is to suggest that men, who are in a position to share parental leave but believe it's the "women's place" or that they can't do it, need to grow up.
David Houssein:
Antonia Tzemanaki - I just re-read the article to see whether I'd mis-judged the tone, but it still felt quite critical of men in general. I've never known "man up" to be used in the context you describe - I'm sure there are lots of men who've been on the receiving end of some pretty nasty comments and would struggle to agree with you. But I guess we just have different interpretations and will have to agree to disagree.
I actually broadly agree with the sentiment of the blog. Like Stephen, I think it's employers who should be taking the criticism and not men (OK, some of us are idiots but that's nothing to do with gender!).
Abimbola Akanwo-Hood - I didn't, but having just had it quick look it does seem to chime with some of what I am saying. 55% of women wouldn't want to share with parental leave, so it would be unfair to criticise their partners.63% of men who already have children would likely choose to share parental leave if they could, so again it seems unfair to criticise these people. The report seems to suggest very strongly to me that men, for the most part, are not the problem.
The only way we will solve inequality is by being collaborative rather than divisive. I know that's part of what Abbie is trying to say, but for reasons I've already explained, I don't think telling men to "man up" is helpful.
Amy Louise Anderson-Beecham:
I have never really looked into what paternity/maternity leave and pay is offered; I understand from friends of mine that Maternity pay isn't great from some employers but not much is said regarding paternity pay. I think for both men and women it is heavily dependant upon who they work for (their company policies) and whether the worker is Salaried or Hourly paid.
As recently as a few weeks ago I was checking through the paternity policy at work as one of the men in my team (hourly paid) was about to become a dad for the first time and wanted to take his two weeks paternity leave. We both read through the policy and I was disgusted with the poor pay that he will get during the two weeks. At first we both thought we had read it wrong but the weekly pay he will recieve is less than what he would get paid for a 12 hour shift! He is still taking the two weeks paternity leave and we have tried to work his shift pattern so he can spend as much time at home with his new daughter as possible without him losing out on too much pay as he will need that to live, with his wife on a lower wage due to her maternity leave.
Stephen Booth:
Where I work women can take up to 2 years maternity leave (after a qualifying period, 5 years I think); 6 months at full pay, 6 months at half pay or SMP (whichever is higher) and then a year at zero pay. If they are in the pension scheme then the employer continues to make pension contributiosn so their service for pension is not impacted. If they haven't completed the qualifying period then they get pro rata on time (so if they are half way through they can take 3 full/3 half/6 zero pay), and the qualifying period continues to accrue (so if they have 2.5 years service and take a year maternity they will come back with 3.5 years service) as do all other timeserved benefits (automatic increments, additional annual leave &c). They also accrue annual leave (and retain any left over leave from the year they started maternity leave and if they were off for more than a year the leave year encapsulated within their maternity leave) so very often the first thing that happens when a woman comes back off maternity leave is she then goes off on annual leave to use up the leave she has accrued.
Until the legislation around paternity leave and later shared parental leave, men got two weeks unpaid that had to be taken within the first year after birth and could only be taken in blocks of one week at least 4 weeks apart.
Things are slightly more equal now but there is still a strong reluctance by managers to allow men to take parental leave. I've been involved (as a rep/advisor) in two cases where a male member of staff has had a spotless record for years but after requesting and getting (only after a grievance) parental leave has found themselves facing a series of disciplinary cases on minor matters.
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